I'm waiting for my interview (3v3 gold trophy :P)

I have a statement to make in my capacity as FiveStarGeneral's manager:

My client, FiveStarGeneral - who I will thereafter refer to as 'FiveStar', as he is colloquially known - has decided to come come clean and confess:

FiveStar does, in fact, have a secret obsession with BTS, and has actually listened to all of their albums. 'Love Yourself' is FiveStar's favourite album, and he does fancy Jungkook a little bit, but, like, in a normal, homoerotic kind of way. FiveStar doesn't know why he lied earlier in this forum, but hopes that by coming clean he'll maintain his good reputation and avoid being the target of a witchhunt at a later date should his lies be then uncovered.

FiveStar wishes to also express that he remains interested in an interview with Pardon.

Thank you for reading,
Quicksilver - Manager of FiveStarGeneral

Edited 5/31/2020 09:52:23

I'm glad this kind of banter has returned to the forums... I was missing it!

LOL wow... rakleader I've found you a new friend.

What? How?

When will be the next interview?

Sure, I'd be happy to answer some questions

Unfortunately your stats are too good. You obviously don't belong to Warzone's best; you belong to the absolute elite. And as an absolute elite, you should never answer any question from the community. They'll just dumb you down!

my laziness is exceeded only by my laziness

FSG and I are figuring out a time where we're both good to do the interview

I never heard about Natto, however his profile says he's some sort of world champion

Maybe I am just too new

You've never heard the tale of natto the warlight world series champion? Well, it's not a story the warzone forum would tell you...

ok nvm they were 2-player tourneys XD

Interview with FiveStarGeneral (https://www.warzone.com/Profile?p=3388515225)
SixStarGeneral reached a personal best of 2109 on the MTL.
He has also achieved trophies nowhere else.

Here is the interview I had SevenCircleMarshal. Post-interview, it is easy to see how he got his 5 stars.

The interview is as follows:


Pardon:
Hello FiveStarGeneral


FiveStarGeneral:
okay


Pardon:
good to speak with you


FiveStarGeneral:
you're welcome


Pardon:
let's start off with the name. how did you get your five stars? that is quite a lot of stars.


FiveStarGeneral:
it's my elementary school nickname
people called me that because i knew a lot about wars and worshipped war and was a warlike bloodthirsty child


Pardon:
at my school, we labeled those problem children


FiveStarGeneral:
get back on your yellow school bus


Pardon:
yessir general
many members of the community wonder why you don't have a profile picture, nor a discord picture
at times, it is easy to mistake you for others, for example, perhaps Max


FiveStarGeneral:
never seemed worth the effort
i'm a busy man


Pardon:
I've also heard you have been learning German recently. is this related to your interest in war? do you have any favourite words or phrases?


FiveStarGeneral:
mmm that was a while ago. 89th taught me a little when we played CL together
i don't
but i like how they mash together 5 words and call it a new word


Pardon:
yea I like to do that with my food sometimes


FiveStarGeneral:
well i don't think i'll be asking you to cook for me any time soon


Pardon:
you will also be happy to hear that I did get into contact with your manager, Quicksilver. he emphasized your adoration of BTS. can you fill me in on why you like them?


FiveStarGeneral:
lmao dude
i need to fire that guy
i literally don't know a single thing about BTS
i like IU
there


Pardon:
great! well she did a recent song with suga


FiveStarGeneral:
oh yea that one was meh to me. a little too poppy for my taste
i like her acoustic songs more
helps me go to sleep when i've lost some CL games


Pardon:
got any recommendations?


FiveStarGeneral:
through the night
heart
windflower
knees
peach


Pardon:
good to know
let's get into the Warzone questions now


FiveStarGeneral:
i like spicy food
favorite color is red


Pardon:
maybe we'll get the doctor to check in with you after this
but for now, let's focus on Warzone
you got 1st on the multi template ladder before. do you think you are the best player on Warzone?


FourStarGeneral:
short answer, yes
long answer, rufus may be better


Pardon:
that hedge was disappointing to hear


ThreeStarGeneral:
hedge?


Pardon:
admitting rufus may be better


TwoStarGeneral:
i am humble
wait no, i'm definitely better than rufus
please refer to this: https://www.warzone.com/MultiPlayer?GameID=20753242


Pardon:
well you did go 6-0 on french brawl in CL. do you think you are at least the best french brawl player on Warzone?


OneStarGeneral:
yes, i do


Pardon:
fitting for a general with 5 stars
we look forward to having you carry ONE next CL


ZeroStarGeneral:
hmm we'll see about that...


Pardon:
don't worry, as muli has mentioned before, retired players will be considered for only 2 slots. good luck!
throughout your Warzone career, you must have come across some of the best players repeatedly. which player do you think you have the most trouble with?


FiveStarGeneral:
rufus and mod are always tough matchups


Pardon:
which player is unnaturally easy for you?


FiveStarGeneral:
timi
i wish i got to play motd more
i think i've only played him like once


Pardon:
we all do


FiveStarGeneral:
:[
hope he comes back


Pardon:
what is dead will live again


FiveStarGeneral:
haha amen


Pardon:
throughout my research, and during talks with Quicksilver, I noticed that there is something striking that sets you apart from the other MTL trophy holders
this would be your remarkable lack of success in other areas of strategy in Warzone
as of now, the MTL is your only golden trophy - do you got any plans to fix this?


FiveStarGeneral:
not really
i'm doing a 3v3 run atm though
i'd like to get a trophy but it's ok if i don't
brb gotta do #2 irl


Pardon:
slightly disappointing to hear on both fronts
when you're finished, let me know and we can move to the bullet round of questions


*2 minutes later


FiveStarGeneral:
We can continue I'm on phone ;)


Pardon:
classy
for these questions, please answer with just 1 word and as quickly as you can. do not put too much thought into it.
warzone or chess

FiveStarGeneral:
Wz

Pardon:
warzone or warlight

FiveStarGeneral:
Wl

Pardon:
ONE or TWO

FiveStarGeneral:
Two is better than one

Pardon:
ONE or FIVE

FiveStarGeneral:
FIVE

Pardon:
hmm seems we'll have to work on our reeducation lessons some more
nonetheless
min34 or max35

FiveStarGeneral:
Min

Pardon:
min(34, max(1, 12))

FiveStarGeneral:
12

Pardon:
well done
favourite warzone player

FiveStarGeneral:
Plat

Pardon:
alright, last question
would you be open to a tournament style competition among the MTL trophy holders?

FiveStarGeneral:
If there is cash prize involved
If not, please submit an appeal to my manager
But tbh yes I think it'd be quite fun

Pardon:
perhaps we can come to some agreement with raklideur about that prize

Might I ask why the stars start decreasing in the middle of the conversation?

Wow, huge disappointment to see that you neglected your German studies. You get zero stars for that!

Next interview will be with mighty Mod

Let me know if you got some questions you want to ask him

Pls organize my interview through Kronos.

will there be an self interview?

if you need a mediocre Player to interview let me know

Let me know if you got some questions you want to ask him

How does it feel knowing that Farah♦ is wearing underwear with "I love MoD" printed on it?