You can never descend.

Mind control

But only at 2:37:10 in the morning

The ability to control the speed of anything

Time moves faster or slower for whatever you control the speed of, to compensate. Net change is unnoticeable.

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Perfect gaydar

But as you read others' sexuality, you become the same sexuality

Ability to excel in every form of art more than anyone ever before

Edited 10/22/2020 23:09:26

No one appreciates it

Able to summon tacos at will

But they go straight into your left ear

The ability to make anything disappear

But they reappear after 3 seconds

The ability to respond to my own comment

Except you can't choose a superpower

Telekinesis

You get a nosebleed whenever you use your power, and you die of blood loss after 3 seconds

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Love Sausage (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eu-YPClimZE)

Things will reappear in your stomach (EDIT: I was responding to @Liechtensteiner)

Predicting with 100% accuracy your opponent's moves for the next turn

Edited 10/23/2020 00:29:16

Except they know your moves as well.

Ability to hop into people’s bodies and control them.

Edited 10/23/2020 14:53:53

You get all infectious diseases from the person you hop into.

Union of Soviet Socialist Republics

They don’t lose control of themselves either

The ability to cut anything perfectly

(Please downvote the post 2 above this one, it doesn’t make sense)

Side effect: being fun at parties

Flexible spine --> being able to put your head all the way down ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

You are unable to use your legs

Can breath underwater

Can’t breathe out of water

The ability to make everyone agree with you

Side effect: world domination

Having a twisted sense of humor

(the side effect shouldn't be positive @berdan)

except you have to blurt out everything you find funny

the ability to control the viscosity of ketchup

But only to make it less viscous

The ability to summon any animal at will