chics don't like guys at the bottom of the ladder.

Ask 4chan or something, even they're more helpful than us.

I didnt go to prom. Rip. But at the time i just recently came here from Russia and didnt understand what prom was. And even if i would have, my thick accent wasnt gonna get me a date.

Options:

1) Go gay/bi and take Karl, he needs one too: https://www.warlight.net/Forum/251146-tfw-gf

2) Call in sick

3) Kidnap a girl's family and threaten her if she refuses to go with you

4) Hire someone to consort you for the night on fuq.com

5) Leave school before the prom day

#3 doesn't work because I don't live in Brazil

https://youtu.be/8SwuoDtplfU

Ayo trex, come help me swag this kid out

chloroform and duct tape, my dear boy. chloroform and duct tape

I'm pretty sure a gun is easier to get in 'merica than in Brazil, that's all you need for an efficient kidnapping.

^meeting endless standards and hopping through all sorts of hoops of training classes and other regulations isnt easier than walking up to a guns salesman and making a simple purchase

Edited 3/17/2017 02:44:52

I know a prom might seem very important when you're still in school. But after school, everything that happened or didn't happen there becomes inconsequential. The only lasting thing I have from school is a couple nerdy friends that I play chess with on occasion. The same thing is true with learning - if you want to learn something useful, go to Wikipedia instead of a school.

Don't worry. This is just biology, sociology, and psychology defending the rest of us from fascists.

Are you still mad that someone called you paki in school? And now it's every Trump supporter's fault. Please go see a psychiatrist if you still have traumas about that.

Go with all your friends (i imagine the don't have dates either). (let's be real prom (well idk if there are a lot of black kids in your school ... but it doesn't really matter) is a bunch of people wanting to fuck but like the principle is right there so they just kind rub up on each other with clothes on) cus like if you really haven't even talked to a girl, cus you seat next to each other in class, then RIP BC lets be real going with a random girl is just gonna be awkward.

if I were in your situation (which is scarily likely to occur 2 years from now), I would ask out my crushes by being like "will you be my date to the prom because my crush moved away and I have nobody now"

not sure if it's even a winning strategy but it works pretty well if you're too shy to confess you love someone directly and want a more subtle approach

relax and don't make it seem like too big of a deal; don't sound too desperate but don't be a totally aloof jerk either who "just wants a date to the prom"

BUT... ermm.... you seem to be trying to do that so.... idk

im more of a guy who'd rather cryptically flirt and compliment girls to make them like me and start following me around over actually asking them out

so gg you're screwed lol

but whatever you do, don't say that you're only asking her out because you have no date

that'll just make her feel like trash, unless she's one of those girls that don't care about relationships... which means now you're going to have an affection-less date

instead, if she asks you why, tell her that you appreciate something SPECIFIC that she does and that you think she does it well

this will make it appear like you have a genuine interest in her rather than just trying to get laid (and then failing afterwards)

it'll quickly distinguish you from all the other guys who have no idea how important it is to convey the "I love you as a person and not because I think you're just hot" message

oh and if you end up actually liking someone, PM me and I'll teach you how to GET a girl rather than talk to one (as I've spent more research time into that)

Edited 3/17/2017 12:00:15

1) Make a plan with one of your guy friends, stating that if neither of you have a date, then you will go together.

2) If the above option doesn't happen, find a girl who also doesn't have a date. Ask her. Do NOT tell her that you went for her just to get a date to prom, but play it off nice and cool, like:

"Hey, do you have a date to prom, yet? Oh, really? Well in that case, would you like to go with me?"

Worst case scenario, she says no.

3) Come out of the closet.

how do you expect people here to help you when almost nobody knows anything about your personal life expect your alt-right rambling?

all I can say is if you are acting the same to girls as how you act here, then that's the problem.

What's a prom?

What's a prom?

It's a mating ritual for americans. You'll want to research it from a specialist in this particular kind of beast, though. :)

topkek nice shitpost turkroach

I agree. I enjoyed the shitpost from the turkroach as well. I also found it "topkek" and pretty nice.

I'm eating a topkek, what's your point?