<< Back to Off-topic Forum   Search

Posts 1 - 14 of 14   
"You have no life.": 10/6/2018 05:16:29


Halca
Level 58
Report
Do you have a life? Well of course! We all do, but what I mean is do you have a real life or are you a loser who does nothing all day and has no hobbies??? In all seriousness though, as long as you're enjoying your life and accomplishing what needs to be accomplished, you really shouldn't feel the least bit guilty, even if you spend almost all day in your room on your laptop, video games or phone.

Truth is, when someone tells another person who's maybe a bit different from the norm, that they have no life, all they're really doing is attributing their own set of ideals (as to what life is supposed to be about) onto others, passing judgement that someone's lifestyle is boring because it isn't in accordance to the preconceptions originating within the standards of one's own lifestyle, or the lifestyles of others within the culture.

There is really nothing wrong with being a recluse, an introvert, or a drawn off person with unconventional or even limited hobbies. You'd be surprised how many introverts are happy and how many extroverts with many different hobbies are struggling to find stable happiness and fulfillment. The reality is that introverted people are much more likely than extroverts to find solace with less. So to some degree, there are many advantages to being a reclusive introverted loner (by choice of course).

If you prefer sticking to yourself, it will probably require a lot more for you to feel loneliness, so as a result you're less reliant on others in person for happiness. You will not have the same burning desire to be with others all the time. You may not feel the need to start a family, have children, make a million dollars, or live the 'american dream'. You may not feel required to do as much in your life as your extroverted close friend who's currently at the movies with her boyfriend/his girlfriend.

But guess what! You may be surprised to know that the amount of fun your friend is having is only equal to the amount of fun you're having at home playing one of your favorite video games, reading some articles on the internet, or a book, or chatting with a few online friends. You could be at home doing what society tells you isn't worth anything of value, free of any expenses, while feeling better at the end of the day than your friend Tim who just spent 50 dollars treating his family to an expensive meal at a restaurant.

An interesting lifestyle to one person may not be an interesting life to another, and a 'good life' should never be a constructed standard enforced by a society, indicated by relationships, children, certain accomplishments, or status. You define yourself and what matters to you. You don't have to do what 95% of other people are doing in order to be successful. You don't even (necessarily) have to go to college, or get married, or start a family, or do this, or do that, or watch this popular movie, or listen to this mainstream song, wear this article of clothing, or read this book, or visit this event.

Learning about philosophy and cultural anthropology opened my eyes to how American society socializes citizens into feeling as if they require so many things in order to be happy. Are people not content with much less depending on the culture? Again, some people don't require much at all in order to be happy, while others may require a lot more in order to be happy. I have a personal story regarding someone I used to be very close to:

One of the most (formerly) depressed people I know speaks 5 languages, has traveled all across the entire world, has been to hundreds of concerts, plays multiple instruments, has met many famous musicians, and has performed as the lead singer in a band. She's doing a little better now, but keep in mind, she felt lonely often, and she was overworked. She was lovesick. She required what most people with "no life" don't require, in order to be happy.


































Okay I wrote all this to feel better about my chronic warlight addiction! On all accounts I earn a million points per month, and I need to crawl out of this game before it sucks up my entire life. :(

Edited 10/6/2018 05:32:56
"You have no life.": 10/6/2018 08:43:00


Sakata Gintoki
Level 58
Report
No Game No Life
"You have no life.": 10/6/2018 10:27:40


Dutch Desire 
Level 60
Report
So warzone/gaming/reading is the most fulfilling purpose you could find?
"You have no life.": 10/6/2018 11:13:12


Sora【𝓒𝓑𝓔𝓦】
Level 57
Report
I have 2.6 mil across two accounts get on my level
"You have no life.": 10/6/2018 14:08:40


AbsolutelyEthan 
Level 63
Report
That’s a lot of money
"You have no life.": 10/6/2018 14:31:59


Dutch Desire 
Level 60
Report
Can I rent in for 3%?
"You have no life.": 10/6/2018 21:09:19


RainB00ts
Level 46
Report
If think having "a life" i.e. a normal productive existence is important, then I'll believe you. But I will be your first critic when you turn around and complain about the "normality" of society.
"You have no life.": 10/6/2018 21:45:41


ZeedMillenniummon
Level 59
Report
^ Not at all!

Normality is fine. The issue is when people who are different are wrongly criticized for it. :)
"You have no life.": 10/7/2018 14:46:35


Halca
Level 58
Report
"If think having "a life" i.e. a normal productive existence is important, then I'll believe you. But I will be your first critic when you turn around and complain about the "normality" of society."

No no no, what I mean is not that normal is bad. Have you ever heard the phrase "normal is boring"? I didn't say this, but I have heard people say this. :P

What I am saying is that being an introvert and being a shut-in is not bad. It is not good, but it is not bad. There are certainly advantages to being extroverted as well as advantages to being introverted. My whole thing is just about fairness and respect for different lifestyles. A lifestyle isn't necessarily bad because it is different.
"You have no life.": 10/7/2018 15:03:52


Dutch Desire 
Level 60
Report
Productive is good, and not being productive is bad. Different is not bad if it is still productive, but your lifestyle with little to no productivity is bad.
"You have no life.": 10/7/2018 15:19:36


Death Cat
Level 59
Report
^ that is true
"You have no life.": 10/7/2018 16:08:46


β”‚ [20] β”‚MASTERβ”‚ Rikku β”‚ I love my wife β”‚ • apex β”‚
Level 61
Report
'What I am saying is that being an introvert and being a shut-in is not bad. It is not good, but it is not bad.'

Hikkimori / Shut-inism at any serious level relative to it's definition certainly seems like it would be bad for an individual over an extended period of time. Also have to assume it's more of a one way process hard to make up for lack of skill development and decline of ones you had while you were living such a lifestyle. Idk just don't live to extreams

But the stuff in the first post about finding what's important to you and not living to others expectations is good imo.
"You have no life.": 10/7/2018 16:40:35


ZeedMillenniummon
Level 59
Report
"Hikkimori / Shut-inism at any serious level relative to its definition certainly seems like it would be bad for an individual over an extended period of time. Also have to assume it's more of a one way process hard to make up for lack of skill development and decline of ones you had while you were living such a lifestyle."

That is something I would never deny. :P

First post some things could have been explained a bit better. The thing is, there is a difference between hikikomori but having social skills and a responsible and healthy life, vs hikikomori in which the person's life is stagnating, and they may be afraid of social interaction and maybe has some psychological barriers to overcome.

The real reason this thread has been made is because of two things. One is that our speech professor constantly tells us we have no lives because we are not watching the most popular movies, and going out all the time to different events. He says things like this every class, and it's hard to tell if he's truly joking or if he means it to some degree.

Other reason is anthropology, philosophy, and watching videos in which I have learned how people in societies marginalize others for being different, and we see this all the time, and I could give really obvious examples as to what I'm talking about but I know everyone here is aware of what goes on here.
"You have no life.": 10/7/2018 18:28:50


The Joey
Level 59
Report
I think on a philosophical level I agree with you, and certainly outliers do exist who fit your description. But if you accept the fields of evolutionary science as an axiomatic framework to make generalizations about human beings, and what makes us happy than I think you can make some valid broad generalizations about people. People are social animals, with natural tendencies for what make us happy. On average people tend to be happier if they have strong social bonds, eat healthy, and get regular exercise. That is not to say anyone should ever be critiqued for being different. But I also know a few people who live like you described and are really unhappy, but live in a state of delusion/denial about what causes their unhappiness. Instead blaming it on self-diagnosed chemical imbalances, Trump/politics, etc. So instead of fixing their lives they just continue to self medicate, isolate themselves, and complain about being unhappy. So I don't think its 'wrong' for society to tell people what it takes for an average person to be 'happy.' Because there are a lot of people who just don't realize humans are just animals like dogs, whales, monkeys, etc. Not some special 'different' creature who's happiness is unaffected by their environment, and habits. If you took a dog locked him up, stopped him from experiencing any real social interaction, fed him poorly, and never let him exercise no one would be surprised if he starts to behave and act poorly, why are we when humans do the same?

Edited 10/7/2018 18:31:24
Posts 1 - 14 of 14