You know how sometimes something's funny, but you just exhale a little and slightly smile instead of genuinely laughing?
That's how I felt. 2nd one is actually pretty good.
A rabbi and his wife have been having marriage problems. Although they have been together for 30 years, he has started to gamble away their joint bank account with his friends. His wife is none to pleased. One day, the rabbi decides to go away with some of his friends to a beach house. "I won't be spending our money, dear" he says before he leaves. She has faith in him, and wishes him a safe trip.
While on the beach, the rabbi and his friends start gambling. While he is reluctant, remembering what he said to his wife, he decides to join in anyways. As the game goes on, the stakes rise. Now the rabbi has to put in 800 dollars, or he's out. But the risk could be worth the reward.
Alas, the cards don't go his way. In shock, he clutches his chest and falls to the ground. His friends rush over, but there's no pulse. By the time they get to the hospital, he is dead.
His friends panic. The rabbi's wife has no idea her husband has died, not to mention losing over 3000 in total. But his friends go to their home as soon as they can, and knock on the door.
"Oh! You're all Daniel's friends! What are you doing here?"
The friends tell his wife the story. By the end, one of them is crying. However, the wife has fallen, sobbing constantly.
"We understand Ms. Cohen, we all loved Danny a lot-"
"That's not why I'm crying you putz! He lost the 3000 dollars!"