For the door guards too.

Dear Diary,

Today I got a phone call from mister popular, Barack Obama. This guy kept telling me over and over how I should be a more linent leader, and North Korea should become a true democracy, yaddy yaddy yadda...I think its funny how big ears thinks he knows what's best for my nation when he can't even build a better image for his own nation.

Wing crapped on my imported Persian rug. I don't know what that dog ate but the rug is definitely ruined.

I saw Yong Jong-Rig walking in the park today. He was talking to another general, Kim Jong Chol. For whatever reason Jong-Rig gave Jong Chol a flower. I don't know what's up but Im supposed to be the one who gets the flowers...

Love,
Supreme Leader<3
Entry#3

I've known it!-Jong plans a coup d'etat!-Or he is gay!-No matter what,you have to get rid of him before he does anything bad towards you.
And I believe,that another door guard
should be send to concentration camp for ruining your rug by letting Wing in.
And just ignore Obama,he tells BS.
I am your biggest fan!-Could I get an autograph?-PLEASE!

Dear Diary,

I had a delicious baked potato today. It was perfect. Oven cooked with sea salt, glazed with the creamiest butter. Topped with freshly copped chives. I haven't had such a succulent thing since yesterday.

Today wing Jumped out of a window. He fell 3 stories but miraculously landed like a cat. Part of me wishes that dog had died for ruining my favorite rug...

I confronted Jong-Rig about his walk with Jong Chol. Jong-Rig looked a bit flushed about the matter but I demanded an answer. I asked why Jong Chol got a flower that day instead of me. Apparently Jong-Rig respects more than one person...On any account i should be the only one who gets flowers here. I sent Jong Chol to a concentration camp.

On that note I'd like to advertise an open position in my military.

Love,
Supreme Leader <3
Entry #4

I'm always willing to join in a good battle

I'm no commander, but I AM a historian... I can do tactics, but not so much command.

Dear Diary,

Today I was supposed go spectate the glorious launch of our newest nuke. I don't know what I hope to gain watching these tests. Not gonna lie though, this new nuke did fly higher than the last one.

I got a bouquet of flowers today. Jong-Rig's name was on a card. Im glad my little pep talk with him worked out splendidly.

Seems I've found a new general to fill Jong Chol's spot. This new guy isn't from North Korea which makes this whole situation strange for me. Last time I let outsiders in, they tried to kill me with my own tank. Anyway my newest general is Buddyboyd. Kind of a strange name if you ask me.

Love,
Supreme Leader <3
Entry#5

Yes, I was accepted as general for the Supreme Leader!

Congrats

Hilarious and original.

No sarcasm.

Dear Diary,

Today was the saddest day for me ever since my father, Kim Jung Il, passed away. Wing, my favorite dog,passed away. He chocked on a turkey leg that fell from my dining table. All of North Korea weeped for the passing of by beloved companion. Every citizen wept actual tears. Ill need a new pet but Wing has become the mascot of our propaganda program.

I was playing my favorite game, Call of Duty Black Ops1. I was doing really good until I entered a game with the most challenging opponent I've every encountered. His name was, USux_234. He kept killing me with the flying axes. At the end of the game he said, 'I banged your mom hahaha'. With shock and confusion i inquired, 'Daddy?'

Jong-Rig approached me with an interesting request today. Apparently he knows a family who was imprisoned in compound #3 four generations ago. The newest member of said family is a 3 year old boy dubbed Xhan. Jong-Rig has humbly requested the release of the boy and if an adoption can be arranged. Im not too sure about this. Although the boy should be released because he is fourth generation, Jong-Rig concerns me... Regardless I've told him ill obtain the opinion of my neatest general, BuddyBoyb.

Love,
Supreme Leader <3
Entry #6

Edited 7/28/2015 16:40:24

Wow, that is very sad. I'm so sorry for your loss.

If I may, leader. I say that you should allow the adoption. Jong-Rig's quirks are an amaxing adition to your masterful advisor group. It would be a shame to see that wonder fie out. This Xhan would become a grand heir to Rig's position when the time is right.

Dear Diary,

I got a pet baby panda bear today. It took some took some work but I was able to wiggle one out from the Chinese conservation officials. I've named from new pet, Chaou. He is so cuddily!

My car was having engine problems today. It idles to the point were it almost dies. My escort guard was as helpful as a rock. I fixed the damn thing myself. North Korean cars are pretty bad.

I heard a voice in the winds suggesting I let Jong-Rig adopt Xhan. I suppose I have nothing to lose. But Jong-Rig is still a weird fellow. SO true to my total control policies I've bugged and tapped Jong-Rig house. Simply because I can.

Love,
Supreme Leader <3
Entry#7

Edited 7/30/2015 16:28:32

Include me, supreme leader, as a musician to serenade your panda. Perhaps tinker the 1812 overture to include nuclear missiles?

Dear diary,

I love my new panda, Choo. Although he mostly eats all of my bamboo in my garden, his cuddilness makes up for it. He makes cute panda sounds :3

Today I caught a thief trying to steal a potato from my palace pantry! Of all things, this peasant trys to steal a potato. He didn't even try for the cake on the other side of the room. When he was caught he dropped to all fours And begged for mercy. But I had to be a stern leader, a father to my people. The thief was sent to a death camp.

Jong-Rig brought Xhan to work today. The little grimlen was eyeballing me the whole time. I was incredibly uncomfortable at my own staff meeting. However I was moved when the child gave me a flower after the briefing. Under his beady eyes was a smile from ear to ear.

South Korea sent a letter addressed to me today. At first I was giddy! But the letter only read, "Pigs get slaughtered!". I quickly ran to protect the pigs at the palace pens.

Now! The most exciting part! I saw a woman of incredible beauty in a flower patch down the road from my home. If she were a flower, Id sneeze all day for her! Even though im the Supreme Leader of North Korea, im not sure which one of us would be more nervous...

Love,
Supreme Leader <3
Entry#8

Awww... The mushy leader!

Dear Diary,

Choo is a pop machine. His cuddliness does not make up for the mine fields in my own home.

The palace is now often filled with the laughter and delight of a child. Although I highly despise annoyances during working hours, Xhan has turned out to be quite the amuser. My generals and political workers have all been less tense in recent days so I've decided that itd be good for the boy to come to work with his father every day.

Somebody Wes caught trying to defect to China. Why would they do that? North Korea is #1 and besides China will just send them back here. Are these people asking to be imprisoned? Sometimes I think there is something wrong with my people. Anywho, I decided to let the defect choose between imprisonment or be feed to dogs(I sarcastically offered that option). He chose the dogs :/

I saw that women again today! My heart skipped a beat at the sight of her! Oh if only i could work up the courage to talk to her! She was picking some flowers and putting them in a large basket. I guess she is a florist but I couldn't tell for sure without looking up her documents...at any rate in not making any progress just thinging about her. Soon ill take action! But not now...in eating...

Love
Supreme Leader <3
Entry #9

Please, allow my country's envoys, from your trusty ally Putin, to make an appearance

Not if my liasons are not allowed to enter! We have lovely sushi and manga!