Since Gui Richie, to my great dismay, doesn't want to get into it with me, I might as well explain.

|> What relation does age bear to knowledge, skill or competence, Mikkelson?

You really don't know? Maybe in a few years you'll figure this out. In terms of my ridiculous demand one page back, it was an inside joke with Gui. In a recent ladder game against each other he said that he couldn't be bothered to speak to me if I couldn't prove I was old enough to deserve his attention. He was serious. I'm making fun of him for it.

|> i might be misremembering, but arent you a teacher, mikkelsen?

I believe what you meant to ask is, "aren't you a teachers?" And yes. I used to be.

|> Maybe his fiancee is a guy?

Technically, that is impossible. One of the many typos in the story on my website you're all referring to is the incorrect use of the words fiance and fiancee. I only learned this after writing it and someone else pointed it out to me. A fiance is a man engaged to marry and a fiancee is a woman engaged to marry. I had a fiancee because a woman was engaged to me. I am a man so I was her fiance. So while, based on the information you sleuths have gathered, I could be bisexual, I'm not.

Odd that no one's amazing detective work on me included reading my warlight tagline. But that's cool. For future clarity:

I am a huge troll. Don't take me seriously.

http://warlight.net/MultiPlayer.aspx?GameID=2117177

Jr, you write fiction, so misquoting me seems appropriate. The above link has the real conversation.

About age: Someone pointed out to me that a player who once attacked me on the forum is a teenager. Had I known, I wouldn't have expected more from him. I think age can be important. I didn't realize Jr is in fact the man in the picture. After his teammate pointed this out, I apologized to him in our private chat for my mistake. I respect Jr's courage to use a normal name and his actual photo.

Apparently trolling Warlight forums is a way to drive traffic to your website. I'm impressed. By the way, while yall are all going there, if you haven't read the reverse scam attempt, it is one of the funniest things I have read on the internet. Aint nothing better than scamming the scammer in a completely humorous way.

Why shouldnt you use your actual foto if you look like johnny depp?

Yeah, myhand, I only looked at the mini. I always assumed it was Johnny Depp's photo.

This has turned out to be quite informative in an odd way... and well.... now I'm just plain saddened that the picture ISN'T Johnny Depp D:
There is still a missing piece of information though, Gui's real name.

It seems I managed to derail the thread despite my disclaimer lol

About the thread's original topic: I deleted one of the tournaments (the Ancient China one: I didn't plan to join; now that I have it wouldn't be especially fair to keep that RR) and am considering deleting another (if that would encourage some of the better players to join).

About WL's make-up-less Johnny Depp topic: My name has been divulged before (by accident). Also, I think Jr should change his name to Captain Jack Sparrow. He has the look and the right mix of wordiness, attitude and unpredictability.

(If you don't believe my last point, read the in-game chat in the link above and everything Jr writes with Captain Jack Sparrow's voice in your mind!)

I just hope that nobody figures out my name. I am very concerned about personal privacy on the internet.

Apologies, Mikkelson. Took it out-of context.

Hold on. I don't want to beat a dead horse but this is fairly amusing to me and semi-involves me. I haven't diagrammed sentences in forever and this is fun.

Your words:

do you mind telling me your actual age? i think that would be the best way to
determine if we should speak at all to each other...

His words:

In a recent ladder game against each other he said that he couldn't be bothered to
speak to me if I couldn't prove I was old enough to deserve his attention.

So your question asks for his age. The second sentence indicates that based upon that answer you would or would not speak to him. His paraphrase says that you wouldn't speak to him unless he was of a sufficient age.

How is this misquoting? It seems fairly spot on. I mean, like better than 99% of news sources in terms of paraphrasing.

Also, I am so calling him Captain Jack Sparrow.

Captain Jack Sparrow: he said that he couldn't be bothered to speak to me if I couldn't prove I was old enough to deserve his attention.

- couldn't be bothered: impolite
- couldn't prove: assumes one is insisting
- deserve his attention: (a) assumes the matter is important
- overall: his language is strong, inflexible, impolite, direct

me: do you mind telling me your actual age? i think that would be the best way to
determine if we should speak at all to each other...

- do you mind: polite, he doesn't have to if he doesn't want to
- i think: states a non-binding opinion
- would: subjunctive
- to determine: it's one of many options
- if we should: must > have to > ought to > should
- at all: Captain Jack Sparrow was being a bit eccentric and wordy, i wasn't interested in replying but sensed that i had to say something since he did address me multiple times and with rather strong language
- overall: my language is not as strong, more flexible, less authoritative

i've eaten green oranges before. i've also eaten green apples. they are both round. they both have seeds. they are both fruits. inside they both have sugar and water. are they the same?

I have to agree with Dr. Typesomething here. For me its the same coffee in a different cup.

That sounds like Clinton trying to define the word "is". The wording is slightly different (it is a paraphrase) and the overall tone is obviously different. But the meaning is identical.

It's more like "I've eaten green apples before. I have also munched on jade apples before".

Hahahahahaha! Man, this thread is awesome.

Richie Rich, I know you're in denial about how condescending you are, but to be able to break down a sentence that way and believe wholeheartedly in that nonsensical explanation you came up with... that's a whole new level of denial. It's so impressive I feel like I should applaud you. I especially love the part where you point out that the word "would" is subjunctive. And then there's the part where the words "at all" indicate that Captain Jack Sparrow is eccentric and wordy. Highly entertaining. Bravo!

if gui was a thousand years old it would still be a waste of time to talk to him.

There is indeed a slight difference in tone between the two statements. However, the problem lies in that Gui states [not Captain >:)] Jack Sparrow misquoted him, when Jack Sparrow was not quoting him at all, but was paraphrasing him. Paraphrases are by their very nature bound to be different (in fact they must be or else it's plagiarism :P) Therefore, picking out minute differences in the tone of language is.... shall we say, petty?

Sorry there Gui, I quite enjoy your attempt though xD I almost agreed with you until I read it all again and realized this subtle difference.

Yes, I agree that differences in tone are sometimes important and reflect the subtle personal opinions of the person making the statement. However, in this case I don't think it was important enough to point out, and definitely not to the extent of language tone that you used toward Jack Sparrow though your word "misquoting." Well, at least it lead to the link of the chat in question and some amusement. :3

This is funny. I thought Dr. Pepper wanted to play a game, so I played.

I like how Willy Wonka makes fun of my post but then goes on to restate much of it.

Imagination's demotion of Willy Wonka from captain to matey is humorous too.

We even have Rated X for Perversity chiming in!

take my lunch money, just please dont beat me up.

Most underrated woo!